Dear Skinny Me,
I read all the success stories. The stories of people losing half their weight, or even losing enough weight for two people, I know it's real, I know it exists, these success stories. I have seen my very own Uncle lose over hundred pounds and he did it the way I want to do it, eat less and move more. A little over three years ago I lost fifty pounds and before you add, "you did it once, you can for sure do it again," I will admit to the use of diet pills, taken over a year span and an estimated five-six pound weight loss per week, it was awesome and deadly and oh, so stupid. Now, here I am, those fifty and plus pounds back and the motivation nowhere to be found. You see, I am one of those, "need to see results now," types of people. If I don't feel better, look better, fit into my clothes better, walk up the stairs without pain in my knees, if all of these don't happen fast then what in the world am I putting myself through hell over? I know, I know how awful that statement sounds, but just being honest to how much motivation I don't have. So anyone know where to find it? Yes, I want to feel better, look better, fit into my clothes better. I want to be my young age of thirty-two and not have old ladies knees. I want to enjoy shopping again instead of just grabbing the item I need in my size and leave. I don't even know when the last time I was in a dressing room, have you seen those mirrors? Who is the fat girl staring at me and why is she giving me a dirty look? Oh, yes, I get surprised by myself in the mirror, I walk really fast by any full length mirrors. My makeup? Gets put on by a hand held mirror. How sad am I?
In April of this year I had my yearly doctor appointments. One of the first words from my skinny and sweet female doctor? "You're ONE HUNDREDS POUNDS over weight. I almost cried. I probably did, later on. So, time to lose 100 pounds. 100 pounds off of me is the weight of my twenty year old self.
About two weeks ago I started another blog: Truly Trying and thought I would combine that blog with weight loss and life stuff. The problem, I haven't posted ANYTHING about weight loss. So, here we are with this blog. I can't hide now, I am out there and I am going to hold myself accountable but what scares me the most? Not caring. I always have and am scared to death that I always will have the mind set of, "there's always tomorrow." Look up procrastinator in the dictionary and I wouldn't be surprised if my picture took up the whole entire page.
So ... what now? Well, for starters how hard is it to just move for 30 minutes a day? Seriously, not that hard, right? I have a very cute and adorable furry friend who would LOVE for me to take him on a daily walk. My kids take him daily but they have to take him close to home, not much for any of them to explore. I should take my little cuddle buddy on a good walk where he can sniff his heart away and I will just listen to my tunes and not think of it as exercise, just me time. Maybe in time I will enjoy these walks and push myself more. One step at a time. So how about food? I know I need to drink more water so that should be easy. I have a wonderful bottle with a fancy straw and all, fill it up twice and that is more than enough water for a day. I can do that. And food. For now, just stay away from fast food and anything fried and I can kick soda out of my diet too. Let's start with that.
Here goes somethin' ...